ScottCounseling

Attending a new school after a move can be stressful.  Here are some helpful tips to help your child relax, plan ahead and become comfortable with his or her new school

1. Practice the route that the school bus or you will take from your house, by driving there together. Kids feel very reassured seeing the exact trip ahead of time. Do a little homework and talk about the different landmarks along the way. This helps a child know what the other kids already know, the basic geography of the area. Keep in mind that children pay attention to many of the things we adults take for granted — a shopping center with a nice toy store, a cool-colored billboard, a sleek new building and so on.

2. Get permission from the school to visit the building itself, a few days before your child’s first day. Most schools are open for teacher prep and most administrators are sympathetic to this request. Walk through the school together, and again, be sure to hit the places that matter most to kids — classroom/homeroom, the cafeteria, the gym and the outdoor play areas.

3. Help your child practice socializing with the school personnel. Especially seek out those you’ve heard (by plugging into the parents’ network) are outgoing and friendly. Make these encounters brief. Don’t expect much more from harried teachers than a nice hello and a bit of warmth. Also, don’t be surprised if your child doesn’t have much to say. This is fine — for kids, such a practice visit is about scoping out the adults he or she will have to contend with, so real conversation is not a high priority in a youngster’s mind.

4. Practice and model socializing with new families in the neighborhood. Joining the local religious or community center is an easy, no-stress way to meet other families. Just one potential chum in another family is all your child may need as an entrée to other kids, and a new world. If you can manage, host a simple dinner, dessert or afternoon get-together at your house in which you’re essentially practicing the art of becoming a good neighbor and doing some proactive matchmaking — setting your children up with a few other kids in the comfort of your own home. Kids’ relationships can form quickly and are very portable, often moving from the living room into the classroom.

When you face that seemingly impossible transition to a new school and a new neighborhood, remember it’s not impossible. Take a temperamental reading of your child, try a few practice moves and you can make a huge difference. No matter how anxious you or your child are, with a little bit of preparation, you’re on your way to a smooth transition, and, most often, the start of something really good.