Author and Parent Educator, Judy H. Wright knows the right words to use when she’s teaching parents how to encourage their children. Parenting children can be a balacing act that requires us to encourage while avoiding false praise or enabling inappropriate behavior. Wright’s fifteen confidence building phrases provides parents with example of positive encouragement while avoiding unnecessary praise or false compliments.
“Home, home on the range, Where never is heard
A discouraging word
And the skies are not cloudy all day!”
Encouraging Phrases to Build Confidence
Oh, wouldn’t a world without discouraging words be wonderful! Unfortunately,
most parents and bosses tend to feel instead that criticism and pointing out what
is wrong will make others want to do what is right. The truth is that people cannot
improve unless they feel good enough about themselves to believe they are
capable of improvement. An encouraging parent uses methods, words and
actions that indicate a respect for the child and a faith in his abilities instead of
negative comments.
Jack Canfield, author of Chicken Soup for the Soul, often cites a
study completed by graduate students who followed a group of normal two-year
olds around for a day. These typical kids from typical homes received 432
negative statements and only 32 positive statements daily. The teachers, aides
and other children were constantly saying things like “don’t touch that”, “no, it is
done this way”, and “no, you are not big enough.” The national Parent Teacher
Organization (PTO) found the ratio of praise-to-criticism of school age children is
18 negative to each positive. It is automatic human nature to state things in the
negative; we have to learn positive words.
