ScottCounseling

Is your child afraid or anxious?

Parenting children who are anxious often makes the parent anxious too. Parents can help their anxious child develop the skills and confidence to overcome fears so that they don’t evolve into phobic reactions. The following techniques may be used by parents to assist the child in coping with his or her anxious behavior.

Symptoms of anxiousness include:

• constant thoughts and intense fears about the safety
• fears about school and other places
• frequent stomachaches and other physical complaints
• extreme worries about everyday tasks
• being overly cautious
• panic or tantrums
• sweating, fidgety, unable to physically relax
• trouble sleeping or nightmares
• fears of meeting or talking to people
• avoidance of social situations
• few friends outside the family
• many worries about things before they happen
• constant worries or concerns about family, school

As a fun summer comes to an end, butterflies nerves fill the bellies of many children as they get dressed for their first day back to school. Parents assure their child that they will do “just fine.” For most children that’s where the anxiety ends; they reach the classroom, catch up with their friends and get on with their day. But for some children, the anxiety of leaving home and going to school is so overwhelming that they are unable to attend school at all; these children have become school phobic.

About 5-10% of American school children suffer from a mild form of what is commonly known as school phobia. About 1% suffer from a more severe form, leading to serious… Continue Reading

Child do not want us to judge them; especially in a manner that compares them to other children. Successful parenting involves developing a relationship that includes open, positive conversations with your child.

Ask your child how he or she feels about the situation that you are discussing before you state your feelings or present your opinions.

Strive to keep your voice tone neutral and accepting. Be descriptive, rather than critical.

Descriptive example: “I heard you swear, what’s going on?”

Judgmental example: “People swear because they are not smart enough to select a better word.”

Descriptive example: “I see your wearing that beer shirt again. “The school does not allow it and neither do I.”

Judgmental example: “Kids who wear shirts like that turn into drug… Continue Reading

Self-esteem is just that… SELF esteem! Self refers to the person who owns or possesses his or her own esteem. Is it possible to build someone else’s esteem? Parents, educators and child psychology and behavioral specialist have all pondered that question. Here are some self-esteem factors for parents to consider.

Signs That Your Child Has Poor Self-Esteem

• Your child gives up easily

Peer pressure is a tough issue for every child to manage. Everyone wants to have and keep friends. Parents need to help their child realize that peer pressure is a normal part of life and child behavior. Parents also need to help their child cope with peer pressure. The following brief steps are written to help you, the parent, begin to assist your child with this important issue.
Help your child to become more assertive with his or her friends by:

Teaching your child to use a calm but firm voice. Say, “No, I don’t care to be with you guys when you do that stuff.”

Role-play with your child: The parent plays the part of the negative influence… Continue Reading

Do you continually make comments that send your child on a guilt trip? Parents who strive to make their children feel guilty often succeed. The end result of making comments to make a child feel guilty often leads the child in the direction of low self-esteem, aggressive behavior, inappropriate social skills and other undesirable behaviors.

Some common comments may include:

“I feel embarrassed when you dress that way.”

“I feel bad when you talk to your mom more than me.”

“Other kids can help their parents…why not you?
Instead of making guilt-enhancing comments make to get your child to accomplish a task that you want done, ask or tell your child to complete the task. It’s better to be firm and authoritative then manipulative.
Pick… Continue Reading