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Relationships make the world go ‘round and are essential to our lives. Duh, right? We know that intuitively but as wives we are responsible for managing many different types of complex relationships – those with girlfriends, co-workers, parents, children and of course the one with our hubby. We are so busy being, doing and giving to everyone else that we often forget that the most important relationship we can have is the one with ourselves. We must first BE what we desire in others. And the most amazing news is that phenomenal relationships begins with the love that we have for ourselves. Yep, the prerequisite to great relationships is self-love. It is the foundation that sets the stage for incredible interactions, lasting friendships, a fulfilling life and an engaging marriage because it all starts with Y-O-U.
Here are three distinctive characteristics to help you best approach the relationships in your life including your marriage.
Start with a positive state of mind. Attitude shows up in many different ways, such as body language (you know the famous eye & neck movement), tone of voice and of course the words that escape our lips. As wives and mothers, we must model the right attitude because we are seen as role models, heroines and superstars to those around us. People witness the love that you have for yourself through your contagious attitude.
You must mentally understand that your core beliefs influence how you respond to situations, your thought processes and your actions. But, don’t misunderstand, if your mindset is not properly aligned with who you desire to be, then recalibration is possible. It is a decision that only you can make for yourself. We must challenge what we were taught as young children or even as an adult because these thought processes don’t always allow us to fully experience the best of life. To experience greatness in your relationships, you must get to the motivation behind your actions, response and behavior. A mindset of self love reflects out to the world as a woman who is confident, comfortable in her own skin and a person who values the gifts that she brings to this earth.
Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “What you do speaks so loud that I cannot hear what you say.” It’s our actions not our words that speak the loudest to who we are as individuals. Others are watching our conduct and they make assumptions based on what we do. And those perceptions dictate how others will treat us, interact with us, communicate about us and receive us. The love we have within commands us to behave in an admirable manner.
Self love shines through our attitude, mindset and behaviors thus increasing the feeling of trust, respect and love that others have for us. If you want to increase the satisfaction level of all your relationships, including the one with yourself; then spend time reflecting on the message that you deliver with your attitude, mindset and behavior. What does it say about you? All great relationships start with the person in the mirror. When you choose self love then you will experience phenomenal friendships, work relationships and an incredible marriage.
Spread the word. Some things shouldn’t be kept hush hush. And the message of self love is tops on that list.
Jennifer Conner is a sassy love advocate and Reformed Shacker (a.k.a. former live-in girlfriend) who talks straight about life and love after saying “I Do”. Jennifer helps women embrace their role as wifey without surrendering their own identity. She spreads the message of self-love at themarriageeffect.com
Grab your F*REE copy of the Inspirational Love Kit: The Married Woman’s Self Love Guide at lovestartswithme.com